I missed a week again! Welcome to week 30– only 10 more weeks (Lord willing!) to go!!
How do I feel?
Definitely unprepared and a sense of what are we getting into!? But oh so excited!!
I started two main things in the past week: really working on the baby registries and maternity leave replacement training.
Both are somewhat daunting and remind me that in two short months baby Yee will hopefully be here!! Two months and a little bit!! I can’t believe it!!!
As for symptoms, it seems as if I shouldn’t list them anymore because I feel like they’re all the same and I’m just complaining. Haha. So here is the conclusive list of things we can just assume are affecting me from here on out through week ~40: tired (waking up at least once a night if not more), sore, mommy brain, feeling big in general and thus slower and more clumsy lately too.
As for the good things? Excited!!! Also it seems our baby’s really active? Don’t know how to determine that when I have nothing to compare to. But it’s a lot of fun. She enjoys squirming, rolling, pressing/stretching, and of course, kicking me in the ribs!! It can be quite uncomfortable and bothersome when trying to sleep, but it’s also so much fun!! And okay honestly I’m not sure how true this is, but we feel like when Kenny talks to her she often responds. Yes, we might just be delusional already haha.
What is God saying?
I think God has been giving us grace to go harder after Him lately. It’s hard and takes sacrifice, but the word “generosity” has been reminding me to be generous with Him. That the more we give the more we are blessed. And that it takes sacrifice to go after Him, but it is worth it.
I want to be generous, but I can be so selfish especially with my time. It’s hard for me to give up me time and husband time. If I had my way I’d have all the leisure time and husband time in the world especially with the baby on the way. I feel so spent at the end of each day especially with all our activities up and running again. How can I possibly fit in time to spend with Him?
But God’s been reminding me that as much as it’s important to do things like work and spend time with husband and be involved/sacrificial in ministry, it’s even MORE important, infinitely more important to spend time with Him. And if I don’t spend time with Him eventually all those things will fall apart. Also, my time is not my own. As we say with our finances, my time is His and it has been purchased at the greatest price. My time is not my own, but even so, He will bless me when I am generous and spend my time on Him.
It’s not easy. Ms. A reminded us again today that pursuing God is HARD. (And as with the other times when she says this I think darn if it’s hard for YOU of all people how much harder is it for me to spend time with Him!?) However as I get older and by God’s grace I am more and more convinced that it is worth it. I am more convinced of how sweet and fulfilling and joy-filled it is to spend time on Him.
As God reminded me through a circumstance recently, though it is difficult and does take sacrifice, there is nothing more fun and envigorating and enjoyable than being in the center of His will.
May He continue giving me grace to walk in it and continue refining me to be more like Him.
Blessed is everyone who fears the Lord, who walks in His ways!
You shall eat the fruit of the labor of your hands; you shall be blessed, and it shall be well with you.
Your wife will be like a fruitful vine within your house; your children will be like olive shoots around your table.
Behold, thus shall the man be blessed who fears the Lord.