Doctor’s appointment on Monday to check on baby bean and see how he or she is doing. Until then, I don’t think I’ll be able to grasp that this in fact is a REAL thing.
Sure, my body’s been telling me it for the past few weeks, but I was SOOO CONVINCED we were not preggo despite all the signs (and maybe a bit of just not wanting to be disappointed!).
How do I feel this week?
Tired. Quite tired. Of course we haven’t been sleeping much. But still. I feel like I don’t have as much strength. I was doing yoga sometime last week and for some reason all the moves that had been so easy before had gotten SO DIFFICULT. Suddenly I was winded in every downward dog and couldn’t figure out why. I figured it was because I was eating crappy and scolded myself for doing so.
Which brings me to the next things I’ve been feeling: HUNGRY. So dang hungry! All the time. I day dream of cookies at my desk. And I know, most of you are thinking “that’s not out of the ordinary for you!” But now even moreso.
Irritable. More than usual. Little things bother me. And when people call on the phone and are starting to get long-winded, I have the gall now to just cut them off!! Where did this come from!?!?
In awe. I still can’t believe this is real and though I’m looking up ten million articles on pregnancy (from nutrition, to exercise, to fashion!), it still hasn’t hit yet. What’s funny too is that in the past few weeks for some reason Kenny and I have been asked much more than usual if we’re pregnant. We have lied to SO many people. Unknowingly of course! Ugh I can’t wait until we can tell the world about this teeny tiny baby. It’s killing me not being able to share!!!
Scared. Honestly I’ve been feeling quite fearful and it’s only been slightly over 24 hours. Is baby girl or baby boy okay? Are they going to make it to term? But as I started worrying yesterday, I thought “man Melissa, if you start worrying about this kid NOW it’s going to be a loooooong life!” Which leads me to the next section…
What’s God speaking to me?
Do you trust me? Do not be afraid. There are no promises of no pain in this life, but my one greatest promises is the promise of joy. A joy that comes from trusting in me. A joy that comes from obedience. A joy that comes from intimacy. Choose to entrust all things to me.
And how appropriate that one of my all-time favorite verses, really one that helped change my life, randomly popped up on my Bible memory app yesterday morning!
“Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.”