First attempted blog from the iPad my husband has been graciously allotted through work, which I am allowed to use since he already has one! I think I will mostly use it to blog as much as my blogging inactivity is due to inconvenience and my husband’s New Years resolution for me is more blogging haha. Since when do spouses get to make resolutions for each other!? I can definitely think of a few… haha.
So what to say of this year?
It has absolutely been a year of tremendous joy and tremendous CHANGE, which is interesting since I am actually so adverse to change. But I guess significant shifts in life and in emotion can only come through change.
So wisdom says you should only change a few things at a time and almost everyone who counseled us about change and marriage said to try and leave mostly everything the same since marriage is such a huge difference! But we kind of disregarded all of that when we felt the Lord pulling us in different directions and like the great cloud that led the Israelites, I really do feel we have faithfully followed the Lord and maybe it’s craziness to conventional wisdom, but praise God we are so much better for it.
Side note… ugh I’m so long-winded! Too many years of not writing!!
So what so far has changed?
1) Marriage. Obviously.
It’s been 7 whole months and honesty marriage is still great! I think a lot of people tried scare tactics on me and made me anticipate the worst and it’s actually worked out quite well because my expectations have been so far exceeded! And that does not mean I don’t doubt marriage is tough and that some people really do kick it off with a terrible season, but at least for Kenny and me this season has been tremendously good.
I hate to gush so much, but it’s true that after you get married you find you can love this person you’ve chosen even more than you could have thought when you first got married.
I think too, or at least for scaredy cat/somewhat jaded me, there’s this deep hidden sigh of relief when you both finally commit to each other. It’s like finally at last I was able to give my entire heart to Kenny. Like once I finally finally chose him, there was this greater freedom to love and be loved more.
I can’t really explain it, and I don’t think I realized I had been holding back, not until marriage.
And sure there is still risk involved and I don’t take that lightly, but my hope is that the Lord will sustain us and help us keep the vows we made and that those vows would keep us and hopefully somehow our marriage will point people to our great God.
Again. Long-winded ness haha.
2) New job!!!!!!!
So I don’t think I’ve written a single thing on here about my new job, but not too long after marriage, the Lord dropped this amazing opportunity in my lap to work at a place and in a position that I have come to absolutely love! I think I’ve been waiting to say anything too excited until the job honeymoon dies down… But I can cautiously assert that I love what I do and I know this is only the Lord’s doing.
Soooooo much more I could say about work and I feel I need a whole other post to talk about the desert/wilderness that was my old job (though also how good and necessary it was) so I’ll save most of that for another post which will probably never come to fruition.
But praise God for His perfect plan and timing! For leading me to such an amazing place and a position that is such a good fit! For taking me through the desert and teaching me trust, perseverance, commitment, and contentment… difficult lessons that involved much struggling and failing, but were oh so necessary and have given me an even greater appreciation of this job.
3) New church.
So to be honest, this was the hardest transition for me. I had lots of fears about changing jobs and getting married, none of which came to fruition, but the pain of leaving a church I love so much was very very real!
It’s funny because I don’t think I have ever loved a church so much… It’s even funnier because no offense to Lifesong, but what comes to mind is the verse about how Jesus did not have an outward appearance that would cause others to regard Him. In the same way, I feel it really was kind of odd for a young adult like me to fall in love with this church so much.
But Lifesong a million percent was the perfect place for me to rest and heal after college and I had never experienced before the unconditional love and patience that I received there. I always felt like I gave the church so little, but they gave me so much. I wasn’t loved because I was a church super star and was involved in a million things, I was loved simply because God loved me.
Needless to say it was VERY hard to leave especially because it was pretty much the only thing I wouldn’t be able to hold onto after getting married and committing to going to Seeds.
But God has His purposes, and they led me to follow my husband in faith to Seeds. I think it was a much slower start than expected, but I am definitely coming to love Seeds and especially the young married couples group we are now a part of– ask me about it– definitely my favorite thing to share about when discussing Seeds!! Highly recommended to anyone who is married to start your own group!
4) New housing… And again new housing.
Still the greatest area of uncertainty, but I know God is good and I trust Him and do believe we are faithfully following Him in the area of housing!
So with all the crazy I’m sure there’s other areas of new, but those are pretty much the majors. I still don’t like change, but slowly I’m starting to trust God more with the future and uncertainties.
And really the future never really is certain. The only true certainty and security is in following Him.
That is all for now. Hopefully I start becoming more concise as I blog more haha.
Thank You, Jesus, for 2014 and here’s to 2015!!